Our culture knows plenty about dating rules for straight people, but when it comes to anyone else on the sexuality spectrum, those rules can become confused or non-existent. When dating rules are heavily dependent on male-female couples, it can be hard to decide who’s expected to do what when a couple is male-male, female-female, or anything involving gender fluidity. Plenty of us want to cast off silly gender norms while still trying to figure out what’s considered polite or impolite dating behavior. What are we to do?
We’re not going to lie: There are still plenty of these straight-ified rules that are up in the air for those of us on the spectrum. But there are also a handful of dating rules that we can guarantee you need to incorporate into your dating life if you want it to survive. Below are a few gay dating rules that every man should be aware of.
If You Suggested The Date, You Pay
One of the bigger problems about same-sex couples is knowing who is supposed to pay for what. In Straight World, the guy is usually still expected to pay for the woman. In not-straight world, it suddenly gets confusing. Who’s supposed to pull out a wallet? In the end, the general rule is if you suggested the date, then you’re the one that should expect to pay. It’s not guaranteed that you’ll have to pay it all in full, but it’s just good manners to offer or automatically behave as if you’ll be doing so. The beauty about same-sex dates is things are often considered more equal, however, so don’t be surprised if he offers to at least pay for his half. Likewise, if he offered, you in turn should still offer to pay at least your half. It’s just good manners.
Fancy Dates Can’t Compare To Fun Dates
Speaking of money, plenty of people seem to be getting wrapped up in impressing their new guy by lavishing him with expensive meals and exclusive shows. While having someone spare no expense on you can be flattering and all, it doesn’t compare to the lasting impression of a fun date. Fun dates frequently cost significantly less, but make up for it in creativity and laughter. On fancy dates, people can become uncomfortable with the presence of money like a third wheel, getting between them. But on a fun date, it’s just you and your guy. A huge amount of the pressure’s off and you’ll have a better chance of actually getting to know one another better.
Always Have Some Condoms On You
Don’t assume that you’re going to get laid that night, but always be prepared. Look at it like a healthy dose of optimism! Nothing’s worse than realizing the moment’s at hand and you don’t have the goods to show for it. It can break the mood to have to run out to the store or have a frank discussion about risk and safety, debating whether or not to bother. After all, having a condom on you will show that you care about your date’s safety, too. And he’ll appreciate that.
Don’t Forget About Your Friends
It’s an unfortunate truth that friends often get kicked to the side when a new beau is around. It makes sense that you’d want to get to know the guy better, but don’t do it while completely forsaking your friends. It can hurt to be left behind and treated like old news. You’re allowed to go off the grid for a short while in the beginning, but make sure to come back in full force, eagerly introducing your guy to your friends and vice versa. After all, your friends have been around far longer than your guy has and dealt with way more of your drama. You need them!
“Just Because” Presents Are Nice
This is one of those nice touches that you’re lucky to have in the beginning, and even luckier to have the longer your relationship lasts. Nothing extravagant needs to be bought or any huge gestures made. Just stick to little things and trinkets to show your partner he’s always on your mind. Make him a card, pick him a flower you found in someone’s garden (shh…), or make him dinner. It’s the little things that really make a relationship, and the more they appear in a relationship, the stronger that relationship will be.
How many of these dating rules have you started incorporating into your life? Which ones were you already putting to use? Let us know in the comments!